Missed Moments

 


No one loves to be humbled, if we are being honest. I have put off writing this post because I hate to admit when I've missed a God moment in my life. But I confess, I did. 

A month or so ago, I was on the hunt for a new TV stand for my apartment. I walked into the thrift store and it was like the lights fell perfectly on a beautiful credenza, looking for love and a new home. Score! Just what I was wanting. And truly, it didn't need much work. I was so excited, I left to consult with my fiance, with full intent of coming back to rescue that beauty. 

But, we had a counseling appointment to go to. I spent the drive telling him how beautiful it was, how perfectly I thought it would fit in our soon-to-be home. He said we could empty out the car after our appointment and go pick it up, which only built up my excitement! 

We got home, emptied the back of my car, and drove to the store. I nearly sprinted to the back, dragging him along by the hand. Low and behold, as we inched closer, a red SOLD tag stuck on the top. I stood in disbelief. We were only gone an hour, maybe two. How could it possibly have sold? How could I have been so stupid? 

Jonathan reassured me that something else would come up, but I was so disappointed. That was the credenza that I wanted. That was the one I envisioned in our home. I gave a soft smile and said, "yeah, sure." I thought about it for days. How could I have just let it go? 

A couple days later, Jonathan was trying to cheer me up. We went around to some other thrift stores, and after a few stops with no good finds, we found one suitable. We looked at it for a long time. I just didn't feel a certainty about it. But I really wanted to get a TV stand before the holiday, and yes this one was a little more expensive than I had originally hoped, but it was a fine substitute. As I swiped my card, I felt a little pit in my stomach. Just a soft nudge in my mind that said, "Wait"

But I did it anyway. I bought the stand and flipped it within 24 hours and it was and is so beautiful. I am thankful that I have one. I couldn't shake the feeling that I had missed something, but I went about my life as normal. 

A couple weeks later, I was helping my aunt move to Arkansas, 9 hours away. As soon as I pulled up in the driveway, I saw it. The exact same credenza that I had originally wanted at the thrift store. I couldn't believe it. I could feel it, the moment I realized, "Nicole, you missed out on a God moment." I was impatient, I didn't think that God would care about what I put a TV on, let alone that He would provide me with one that I wanted, FOR FREE. If only I had waited like I felt prompted. But I didn't wait. I didn't trust that God cared for me in the mundane, or that He would meet my simplest desire, if I just waited for Him instead of moving on my own. 

I was kicking myself. How could I have been so stupid. To not listen to the leading. To not wait on the Lord. But in all of this, I have learned lessons, and that is what is important. Our mistakes are teaching moments, not moments where we have to belittle ourselves. 

Sometimes, we don't consult with God about the small things because we don't trust that it matters to Him. But friends, it does! What matters to us, matters to God, because He loves us so deeply and intentionally. We don't trust that He can provide in the smallest situations sometimes, and we miss out on the greatest blessings. 

I was reminded of Abram, who when receiving a promise from God that he would have a son despite his old age, he took matters into his own hands and slept with his servant to get the outcome he wanted. If Abram had waited, if he had truly trusted that God would provide for him at the right time, there would have been so much unnecessary hurt gone from the equation. But, God, in His goodness and sovereignty, still used Abram's impatience and rash decisions and still opted to use Ishmael as the father of a great nation. It was not Ishmael's fault that his father had doubted the promises of God and exploited Hagar, his servant. God still uses our mistakes. To teach us, to show us more ways to lean on Him and trust in His plans. To help us grow in ways that maybe we couldn't have if we were flawless. 

We seek to live in holiness, to walk in the ways of God and remain obedient in all things. But there are times that we stumble, we say the wrong thing, or just plain mess up. That does not discount the grace of God, and His willingness to forgive us and continually redeem us. That does not mean that we should continue to live in sin. For Romans 6:1-2 says, "What shall we say then? Should we continue in sin so that grace may abound? Absolutely not! We are those who have died to sin, how can we live in it any longer?"  

Jesus died to give us newness of life and victory over sin! We live in a broken and sin filled world. But we don't have to be slaves to it. God is our redeemer, friend, and Lord. No matter what you feel like you've done that discounts you from God's grace, you have not gone too far. Repent, believe, and trust. 

My prayer over my life this year is that I would trust God, in the biggest of things and the smallest of things. Because He is faithful. And He cares for me and you. 

All my love, 
Nicole 



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